jeudi, janvier 12, 2012 If a tree falls in the forest without anyone to see it, does it make a sound? Similarly, if you didn’t blog, Facebook, Tweet or Tumblr something that happened in your life, did it ever happen?With the current level of self-management (or is it obsession?), many people would qualify as “self-stalkers”. You know the type – they constantly check their social feeds to see if they’ve been tagged, mentioned, “liked” or commented on. These are also the people who usually live their whole lives online, “checking in” to places, tweeting about things, posting photographs of their meals, and using Facebook to login and comment on various websites. The question from me to them usually is – what happens if you DON’T do it? Does that invalidate your existence? For many people, it does. It has been documented that people often do not feel the full completion an event until it’s been posted online in some form or other. Great holidays that lacked a certain je ne sais quoi – until the photographs were put on Flickr. Relationships that weren’t really exclusive until someone blinked, and changed their relationship status to “in a relationship”. (Relationships have apparently broken down because of this issue.) With this in mind, I’m looking rather mistrustfully at Facebook’s new Timeline feature. Touted as the ability to “tell your story with a new kind of profile” where you can highlight important and memorable events in your life, I’m not sure if it won’t enable us to manufacture a completely different story about ourselves altogether. Given the choice, most people want to put forward the best version of themselves. This is why we dress up when we head for a night out on the town, and why we put our best foot forward when we go for job interviews. Similarly, we curate our personal social media feeds to show the best versions of ourselves, and the best parts of our lives – great meals, fun parties, and amazing vacations. To us, these things “really happened” in our lives. But what happens to events which pass by unnoted and untweeted? Character-molding events have a tendency to leave a bittersweet taste in their aftermath. We probably won’t note a severe reprimand on our personal calendars, but what if, upon further rumination, it deeply impacts your life? A personal timeline should represent you in your entirety – the good, the bad, the highs and the lows. When we can obsessively curate our “public selves” to contain only the good, the happy, and the glorious, we become hyper-aware of our public image, and overly-concerned with what others’ responses to our actions are (you mean nobody “liked” the fact that I checked into the library today?) The choice of what to portray as our "public" selves may prove to be a boon to some, especially to people who value the integrity of keeping the public-private selves as closely related to each other as possible. However, it could also mean the annihilation of the breathing space we need in order to explore different facets of our personality as we grow into our own skins. For fear of ridicule or lack of validation, one could be stopped from trying a new activity that radically departs from your established personality. I'm someone who knows this more than most, since I seem to keep trying things which people find "out of character" or "not really your personality" for me. Case in point: I signed up for tap dancing classes for about 6 months in 2004; it was something I had always wanted to try out, so I found a school in Queensway, borrowed some shoes, and danced. Sometime later (just around the time that I had worked off my curiosity for the subject), someone told me that they had been walking around the shopping centre after dinner and had peeked in on the dance class, only to be surprised at seeing me in class. "Not really your personality leh," they had commented to me. I'm honestly not sure that I would have tried the class as earnestly, had thry made that comment to me just as I was starting out. I might have discontinued my lessons, considering it had I been discouraged from the activity - after all, it's "not my style/personality." With social media timelines conflating the public and private selves, we are going to spend more time obsessively curate our "public selves" that other people base their impressions of us on. People will assume impose certain notions of our behavior, and we will continue to reinforce them on ourselves. The question for us then is - are we ready for the responsibility of redefining who we are online? And in any case, who are we to censor ourselves? Remember how Jim Carrey's John in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind pleaded for the "scientists" not to delete his memories of Kate Winslet's Clementine. "Not this one, let me keep this one," he begged. We are the sum total of all our parts, experiences, joys, tears and laughter - what will become of our "selves" once we start to purge "unnotable events" from our public Timeline? Libellés : technology, thinking [Curation of the Virtual Self] |
jeudi, décembre 22, 2011 Facebook timeline and the curation of our selves With the rollout of Facebook Timeline, we are going to curate our selves more than ever. I'm quite sure that the managing of our public selves - the tweets, the thoughts, the photographs, EVERYTHING - will hit new obsessive heights - not that it hasn't already hovered somewhere around the "self-stalker" territory already. You know the type - someone obsessively checking his/her status to see if they've been "liked" or "commented" on, or tagged in some photo or post or link or note somewhere.The choice of what to portray as our "public" selves may prove to be a boon to people who value the integrity of keeping the public-private selves as closely related to each other as possible. However, it could also mean the annihilation of the breathing space we need in order to explore different facets of our personality as we grow into our own skins. For who doesn't need some privacy to try a new hobby that radically departs from one's own personality?  I'm someone who knows this more than most, since I seem to keep trying things which people find "out of character" or "not really your personality". Case in point: I went for tap dancing classes for about 6 months in 2004; it was something that I wanted to try, so I found a school in Anchor Point, paid for a couple of terms of lessons, borrowed some shoes, and danced. Sometime later (just around the time that I had worked off my curiosity for the subject), Matt/Sam told me that they had been walking around AP after dinner and had peeked in on the dance class, only to be super surprised at seeing me in class. "Not really your personality leh," Matt had commented to me. I'm honestly not sure that I would have tried the class as earnestly had he made that comment to me just as I was starting out. I might not even had continued considering it had I been discouraged from the activity beforehand - after all, it's "not my style/personality." The other thing which continues to astound people is that I like mucking around with household DIY (like grouting toilets and re-upholstering chairs), and I also like fooling around with sewing stuff. I can't imagine experimenting with all this if people impose their impressions of me - I'm no shrinking violet, but the peer (sheer?) pressure would be fairly strong. With Facebook Timeline, we're going to obsessively curate our "public selves" that other people base their impressions of us on. People will read our FB Timeline, and impose/reinforce that idea of who we are back onto ourselves. The question for us then is - are we ready for the responsibility of defining who we are? And in any case, who are we to censor ourselves? Remember how Jim Carrey's John in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind pleaded for the "scientists" not to delete his memories of Kate Winslet's Clementine. "Not this one, let me keep this one," he begged. We are the sum total of all our parts, experiences, joys, tears and laughter - what will become of our "selves" once we start to purge "unnotable events" from our public Timeline? Libellés : technology, thinking [Facebook timeline and the curation of our selves] |
mardi, juin 07, 2011  Just finding the fuel, smokestack and the accelerant - now that's the rub. Libellés : thinking [Flame] |
lundi, mars 14, 2011 Stuck between a Rock, surrounded with Water, and a Railway While I'm no pro-LKY lackey (he's definitely a hard-headed son of a gun), I respect the guy for putting in so much effort into the idea of Singapore. Historically, we've definitely got a ways to go, and honestly speaking, most of us are so comfortable and take things for granted that I doubt there will be another strong push for patriotism and the idea of Singapore - unless something comes along to threaten it. Could the other MM be it? His recently published memoirs sound a little ... illogical, to the extent of being incoherent. Let's take the excerpt from the Sunday Times today for a test-drive: On Water: "Why should Malaysia have to subsidise the Singapore Government? And it really is the Government that we are subsidising, not the people of Singapore who are paying $17 (well over RM40) for 1,000 gallons of treated water. "  I say kudos to smart Singaporean patriots who looked ahead to our future, securing a long-term contract for themselves, their children, and their children's children. I'm sorry that Malaysians didn't have good negotiators, but I count myself blessed to have hard-nosed negotiators who are looking out for my welfare when dealing with international negotiations. For national security purposes (in Malaysia's pov), a smart move would be to reduce Malaysia's reliance on imported treated water through R&D. Though honestly I think they'd probably turn around and complain that Hyflux owns all the patents to water treatment/desalination. But I hardly think it's fair that you blame us from investing in R&D - and thus getting ahead of the race. It was always there for you to run, and again, I'm blessed to be living in a country with these thinkers. This is Rail-ly annoying  "The status of the POA is now murky, with Singapore demanding that we move our Customs, Immigration and Quarantine (CIQ) facilities to Woodlands, which is near the Singapore end of the Causeway. Meanwhile, Singapore began to claim that the land to compensate Malaysia for Tanjong Pagar and the railway line was not to be developed by us alone, but jointly." This just degenerated in to a "he said/she said" situation. Given Singapore's penchant for paperwork, I highly doubt we changed anything. Plus the Pulau Batu Puteh principles (see below), and you have a strong case of suspecting that Malaysia may have shifted the goalposts somewhere. Standing on the Rock
1. Why was it administered from Singapore? (if Msia wanted it so much, why didn't its negotiators insist on administration in Sg?) 2. MM also said that "The decision to go to the ICJ was made while I was still prime minister" - so the decision to move away from "subtleties" to the "books of rule" was overseen by him. 3. Are "books of rule" different from "how the world works"? I thought the world works based on these books of rule. 4. Why is this even linked with an ethnicity issue? Stuck "At one stage, we had agreed that all our unresolved issues be settled together as a package. But because Singapore would never agree to a revision of the price of water, all other issues could not be resolved, making a package solution impossible." Haiz. Another "he said/she said" situation, since we were told by our authorities that the Msians were the one who kept dragging the water issue in. As a patriot, and as someone who looks at the track record of governments and how they function longitudinally, I read this statement, then I take a look at the news caricature in bad taste - ultraman outrunning a tsunami ... and I think - it's a little of "no contest" for logical thought and human decency actually. Libellés : humanitarian, singapore, thinking [Stuck between a Rock, surrounded with Water, and a Railway] |
mercredi, mars 09, 2011 Enough already - let's talk about things that matter  I attended a "business and social enterprise" discussion today, and thankfully missed most of it. Every time I sit through one of these things, it just makes me feel like I'm sitting in a room full of idealists (which is good) who want businesses to behave responsibly to their stakeholders (which is unrealistic.) I keep wanting to say - enough already about "Social Enterprise", and stop embracing it like it's the thing that will save the world. It's just Corporate Social Responsibility/CSR repackaged into a more "sustainable" and "holistic" form, and even that is just good public relations. Instead, let's talk about character. Ethics. Morals and virtues. Integrity. Authenticity. Let's talk about the thing which drives you and I. Let's talk about motivations, and whys. Let's talk about the Golden Rule (or God's commandments), and then let's build these intangible things... then see how enterprising a social spirit innate can be. 2 Timothy 1:7 - For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline. Libellés : christian, personal, thinking, working life [Enough already - let's talk about things that matter] |
dimanche, janvier 02, 2011 2010: Another Year of God's Grace  1. School: 2010's writing exercise was a time of great calmness and having the feeling of being totally covered by God's protection and guidance as friends rallied to pray and encourage.2. Church: CEC's learning curve was steep, and while my body broke down in the end, God again reminded me that it's HIS camp, not mine. An excellent reminder. 3. Community: Some incidents this year showed God working hard behind the scenes: Aunty Jenny reaching out to me mysteriously just as I was at the end of my tether, me reaching out to Regina just as she was about to go under over her head while doing her own school writing exercise, friends reaching out to each other in the nick of time sometimes, and propping each other up in times of need as we lead our quiet, desperate lives. 4. Work: it was a good year of good, solid work. Incomplete, and ever upward, but I felt that I did hold up my end of the ship (as did my boss, phew.) 5. Learning: (a) one more module till I get my BTS LLD cert! (b) sewing is fun, but hard! (c) diving 40m can make you a little loopy (d) cooking Christmas dinner for 30 pax will take 3 days of preparations and approx 5 hours of cooking. ... and here comes 2011.
[2010: Another Year of God's Grace] |
mercredi, septembre 15, 2010  There seems to be colossal confusion over what you need and what you want. Wants have become needs - eg my mom, when looking at the Starhub brochure, became confused over buying cable tv set-top box - in the end, it took all my logic to convince her to ask herself - do you really NEED a HDTV set-top box WHEN WE DON'T EVEN OWN A FLATSCREEN, much less HDTV? Will the purchase do a Numbers (heh) on us a beget other purchases? And honestly, how much more pleasure will it give you seeing Celine Dion’s (airbrushed out) pores on a blue-ray DVD?This is not to condemn those who have decided that they want these things - things are rarely evil in and of themselves (unless you’re talking about maybe...guns or weapons which only have one use) - but rather to examine your motivations when you obtain stuff in the world - is it really necessary for you to have them, or are they merely something you think you need? This message is not new, nor is it innovative - but we are a forgetful people, and need to be reminded time and again of how fickle our hearts and minds are. I think we need far less than what we have. Libellés : christian, issues, thinking, writing [The iWant Generation] |
mardi, mai 11, 2010  Does working life gag the blogger in you? I find that it does for me. There are things that I want to blog about, and anecdotes to tell, as well as situations to poll, but this blog used to come up when you googled my name, so that is a serious cramp on what I want to write.If integrity is based on the understanding that you stand by your written opinions, isn't self-censorship (as what I'm doing) an ethical dilemma? I have an interesting and infuriating anecdote to relate on imperialism, Chinese names, and blind double-standards. Libellés : thinking, working life, writing [Gagged] |
dimanche, janvier 31, 2010  Can't we just be nice to our friends without being it misconstrued as an overture of something more? Libellés : thinking [Nice] |
samedi, décembre 26, 2009  There's no comparing the two; it's comparing apples and oranges. The more important questions are: When are you going to get off the starting block? Are you at the right meet? Are you on the right lane? Those are harder to answer.
[Spring vs Long Distance] |
jeudi, novembre 12, 2009  I feel quite alone, most days.Most of my days, like many, many other young adults, are spent working. That's quite a substantial portion of your life taken up. I split the rest of my time and attention between my friends, my family, and church. Sometimes the friends are in church. Sometimes the family is in church. Sometimes, the church is family and friends. Sometimes the church is bigger (Baptist Convention, Baptist Seminary), sometimes it's tiny (playing with little babies.) It's confusing, I know - but isn't life? I love my life. I say that without reservation or irony or sarcasm. I feel blessed by everything that God has given to me - He's decided where I was born, who I was born to, who my parents are, my bro, my relatives - and through His help, I've made some baby steps at making some decisions, like who my friends are, who my closer pals are, where I went to school, what I do with my life, etc. I'd like to say that I've tried hard to stick with His precepts in keeping the Word at the centre of my life. I'd like to say that very much. I hope that with His Holy Spirit's help, I'll continue to keep the Word close, and keep growing in the knowledge and fear of Him. I just wish that the world wouldn't stand so close to me. ***** There are "safe" jobs to be had. "Safe" jobs in "safe" sectors, where you head to the office and you do your work, and then maybe you meet your partner after work to have a nice dinner at a hawker centre, and then you go home. You finish another year at the company, and then you move up the corporate ladder, collecting $200 as you pass GO, and getting bumped up the promotion scale as you move along. Yes, there are definitely "safe" jobs out there, and I sometimes wish that I had one of them. Sometimes. Not all the time. ***** My job isn't "safe". My job rocks-n-rolls. Last week, I started writing an essay on ASEAN and Civil Society for a think tank. I edited a Summary Note which would feed into the APEC policy process through my boss. I visited a ball-bearings plant in Changi to get video footage of interviews for a research project, which was done in collaboration with a Japanese institute, and the UNEP programme. Then I had a press conference at a famous restaurant and bar. And then I had an amazing international conference with a think tank from Geneva. I met an ambassador or two. That was last week alone. This week, I've had lunch with an ambassador's wife. I've met the head of a very large, global environmental NGO. I've met some of their research staff too - one of whom was involved with Al Gore's team that won the Nobel prize. And of course, the biggie this week: APEC. It's all very breathtaking and exciting. ***** Oh, how I wish the world would not stand so close to me. There are very few overtly Christian people I meet in my industry. I wish I had people whom I could go to, mentors I could turn to for advice on how to do "this whole thing" with God in the picture. People who have gone before me, and have experienced the things I feel, and who are role-models for me to follow. People who would tell me that - yes, this is possible, it's tough, but I've done it. Women, especially, who are in positions that count - tell me that holding on to God is possible, even as everything's rushing by you, and you feel that your grip on the Holy Spirit's getting slippery as you sweat the big/small stuff. Tell me it's possible. Tell me that you've done it. Encourage me with your testimonies. God tells me that it's possible, and I truly believe it is - but where are the faithful few who are the witnesses to this? God says that we're disciples everywhere - to Jerusalem, Samaria, even to the ends of the earth - but not into this arena? Oh bible-believing Christian, where are you? Stand up and be counted. Stand up by the sidelines and cheer the rest of us along. Bloodied and bruised by well-meaning advice that's sincere but completely, utterly wrong, please don't take long. Libellés : thinking [don't stand so close to me] |
mercredi, juillet 22, 2009 From a book I was reading earlier this year (I will come back and attribute when I remember where):Our strengths make us useful,  And another thought around the same time: Ends and Means: the methods we use to accomplish our goals are as important as the attainment of those said goals. Libellés : christian, thinking [Weaknesses and Strengths] |
dimanche, juillet 05, 2009 Thinking about church discipline...  A rather passionate discussion with my mentor today re-started my thinking about the church and my own congregation - specifically, about teachers within my congregation, and about church discipline.This was particularly interesting because my former Pastor, AG, had recently sent along his weekly pastoral note - but the most recent note was not one written by him, but rather a note from another pastor: Where Extraordinary Grace And Celestial Joy Meet Oh, for my congregation to develop true spiritual maturity! We have fallen into the trap that so many smaller congregations fall into: leading the church with who is AVAILABLE, rather than who is ABLE. James 3:1 - Not many of you should presume to be teachers, my brothers, because you know that we who teach will be judged more strictly.Oh, that we would take this injunction from God more seriously! Our teachers in Sunday School, in Wonderkids, in the Hands-On Bible Class, in our various cell/care groups - how many take this warning seriously enough to treat the Word of God with the care and diligence that is needed for good, strong, biblical teaching? How many leave preparations till the last minute, or worse, not bother to prepare at all, relying on "discussion time" to help pass the minutes till the lesson is over? For their inner lives, what do we know of them? How many are living upright personal lives, continually sanctifying themselves through prayer and petition? How many of them are living good family lives? How many are walking together with their partners in the right fear of the Lord? Indeed, how many are actually praying for the church and their friends - or perhaps, the question should be: are they even praying? There have already been examples of leaders who have disappointed with their behaviours. Will we have the strength to do what needs to be done, and to effect church discipline? The dead branches need to be pruned off, and the outlying branches brought and bent back into the fold. Will we have enough strength to impose sanctions and censure our wayward teachers, much less the rest of the congregational flock? Or will we be easy with ourselves, easy with the egos and people, easy with people's souls? The three fingers are pointing back at me too. Libellés : christian, church, thinking [Thinking about church discipline...] |
"In order to change you must take snapshots of yourself like a dispassionate camera and discover how you really are. And you must become conscious of how rarely you are conscious." This is very, very important. We must know that most of the time, we are asleep - for if we are awake for most of our decisions, we would be in pain all of the time - unbearable. Yet, continual self-reflection is needed in order to know where you're going, and why. So we must know that we are asleep for the most part, and rouse ourselves from the depths of apathy and sloth (our natural states), and think about how we do things, and why. "There is a flow to history and culture. This flow is rooted and has its wellspring in the thoughts of people. People are unique in the inner life of the mind – what they are in their thought world determines how they act. This is true of their value systems and it is true of their creativity. It is true of their corporate actions, such as political decisions, and it is true of their personal lives. The results of their thought world flow through their fingers or from their tongues into the external world. This is true of Michelangelo’s chisel, and it is true of a dictator’s sword. A logical breakdown, based on facts taken one at a time: 1.. We mostly operate automatically/not at full thinking capacity. 2. We mostly operate using presuppositions. 3. There are not many world views around. Therefore, it should be of utter, paramount importance that we ensure that we've got a correct world view, and that we set our internal alarm clocks to rouse ourselves once in a while to check our life courses; to ensure that we've still got the correct goal set in our sights. "How Should We Then Live?" is both an excellent book, and a question that separates the living and dying. At the heart of it all, there really are two ways to live. Libellés : thinking [Thinking about Thinking] |
vendredi, juillet 03, 2009 Heartlander is where the Heart is (Part II)  In my last post about how I'm a heartlander, I posited that I am a heartlander because it's about how comfortable you are in your own skin within that HDB-dweller sphere. I refuted claims that I had to be excluded from the heartlander category because of my zip code, or because of my proximity towards certain "gourmet" supermarkets, or because I am able to stand apart from the scene, and appraise/analyse, as objectively as I can, the entire situation.In this next post (I have a feeling this might become a series of posts!) I want to deal with the flip side of the coin - people who CLAIM to be heartlanders, but are really high-society debutantes masquerading as heartlanders. I picked up the SkinnyDrummer two nights ago, as I wanted to make a run to AMK Central to explore wiring possibilities (long explanation, has to do with my birthday party.) She got into the car, and asked me why I wanted to go to AMK when she was the one who was the "true heartlander". This of course sparked off a massive argument (I AM A HEARTLANDER!) which continued through the drive, the parking, the coupon-tearing, and the walking into AMK Central. The first sign that supports my theory that she's no heartlander was when we got to the big square outside ValueDollar/This Fashion - there was a pasar malam (PM) in action! (Sorry about the unfortunate acronym.) Not that the PM was trouble - rather, it was our reactions to them. I was pretty pleased to see the PM because it was a break from the monotony of the regular stores in AMK Central, and because, well, PMs are always carnival-esque, which is cheap welcome relief and entertainment, especially in this dreary economic climate. SkinnyDrummer, on the other hand, was all blase about it. "Please don't stop, please don't stop, please don't stop," was all she could say when we walked past the garishly flashing lights of the game stalls. Aren't heartlanders supposed to fall for this sort of gimmick? I'm not saying that PMs sell snake-oil (some, quite literally, do), but the carnival is a global phenomenon, meant for the peasants, or in the modern context, the heartlanders. The spoilsport pseudo-heartlander was very reluctant to look around the place, grumbling when I picked up a S$1.80 clear folder for my song worship leading that "You just HAVE to buy something right?" Not really, was my reply. I have been waiting for a PM so that I can get cheaper clear folders, which are often hideously expensive at Popular. I delay my gratification for a super duper cheap deal; how is that not a heartlander-ish trait? If I were really atas, I would drive to Takashimaya the instant I wanted a clear music folder, and buy a branded one. So that was strike 2 against the so-called self-proclaimed heartlander. .jpg) But she got one back at me though - when I was paying, she stood beside me, but a lady approached her and tapped her on the shoulder to ask her "Got sell scotchtape or not?" SX was all like "DUUDE, I DON'T WORK HERE." Then she turns around and claims that she's a heartlander because she was mistaken for a PM stall helper.I think I'll give this one for her; the incident afforded many, many minutes of gut-busting laughter. We next move over to the clothes, where I tried bargaining in Bahasa (fail fail fail) for an embroidered top, then got fed up and went to buy food instead. The pseudo-heartlander then starts to moan about the heat and no aircon. Lest you tell me that heartlanders should be complaining since it's a national pastime, it really wasn't a very hot day - it had just rained, and this was past 8pm at night, when it's cooler. So why was this so-called "heartlander" bitching about the heat and running to any place which had the bare minimum of air-conditioning - like, say, the entrance of a store - and stand there flapping her arms and her t-shirt to let the cool air in? Then we walk to the food. And this girl does NOT like 茶叶蛋. And she's never eaten muah chee. And a lot of other stuff at the PM. Now, if I'm not a foodie, and she's a heartlander, how is it possible that I have eaten and love 茶叶蛋 and muah chee while she doesn't like and has never tried all these quinessential "heartland foods"? So my friends, if you won't let it go that I am an "atas-face", then at the very least, please disabuse SkinnyDrummer of the delusion that she is a heartlander. Let her know, NOW. Libellés : humour, singapore, thinking [Heartlander is where the Heart is (Part II)] |
mercredi, juillet 01, 2009 Preach until people are blinded and deafened: "It's CAUSAL - BECAUSE I tell you the truth, you do not believe me.... the truth is so offensive, it guarantees unbelief... articulating the truth is going to harden their hearts... we still remain faithful, and leave the results to God... the Gospel will still be an aroma of life to some, even if it turns out to be an aroma of death to others..." It's sometimes very hard to listen to D.A. Carson, for fear that my head will either (a) explode from the sheer knowledge that he sprouts, or (b) fall off from all the nodding-in-agreement I'm doing! Libellés : christian, church, thinking [Preach until people are blinded and deafened:] |
lundi, juin 22, 2009 Decision-Making Skills: Good to Go, or Good with God? A Series by Heather A. GoodmanPart 1: Want Fries With That? Part II: Knowing God's Will Part III: Living Wisely within God's Freedom In seeking how to best obey God's will in life, I've been asking myself very tough questions recently, not the least of all was my career path. I've been very blessed to have excellent people to lean on and talk things out, and Andy recently sent me and Di a series by Heather Goodman that addresses this particular issue. God does not have a specific workplace, church, or geographic location in mind for us... He gives us freedom to choose these things as long as we seek to obey him and serve his kingdom through these choices. And he will use us no matter where we are or what we decide. I think I'm more stressed out than consoled. Newton's 3rd Law of Motion states that every force has an equal and opposite reaction, which makes sense because every action will (or should!) have a consequence... and what happens if you think you're obeying God, but you're really not? What if you're really being led astray by something or other? Libellés : christian, thinking [Decision-Making Skills: Good to Go, or Good with God?] |
mercredi, juin 17, 2009 Digital Small Talk: Small Social Capital  Many people have noted that the tweets and facebook updates take the fun out of meeting friends; given that you know the little snippets of what happens in everyone else's lives, it DOES get kind of hard to chat about the small stuff. On the one hand, this could be a good thing. When meeting up, you could dive straight into discussion; no more waffling about with the "how are yous" and "I'm fine thank yous". But on the other hand, as this article points out, we could be glossing over rather important information that the tweets/updates don't go into.Some people are what he calls "high self monitors," meaning they are very attuned to the impression they are creating and more likely to manage their public image. "Low self monitors" are less attentive to the impressions they are making and presumably more candid in their updates.I'm definitely in the former category, so this whole idea of small-talk on the web is counter-intuitive for me; I'd rather chat (online, or F2F) than read your tweets. Libellés : technology, thinking [Digital Small Talk: Small Social Capital] |
dimanche, mai 24, 2009 I rather love my AMK (or, Why I Think I am a Heartlander, or Heartland is Where the Home is) .jpg) Rie and I have these terribly funny conversations all the time about how I'm a "pseudo-heartlander", a poser, a wannabe. I, in turn, call her an atas-face, which she takes with a graceful sweep of her $50-or-more-haircut hair (she will refute this vehemently but don't believe her, even if she produces receipts), and basically, well, owns the sort-of insult."At least I acknowledge that I am atas, and cannot function outside of AMK Hub, okay," she huffs. "You are the worst: a wannabe heartlander who cannot admit the fact that you are atas. Ashamed of your own class.*" (* well, obviously not in so many words, but the general IDEA behind the sentiment is correct anyways...) I cannot remember if I've tried defending myself before (I have a sneaky feeling that I have), but after another one of my trips to AMK, I felt that my love for AMK should really count towards my credit! Here are her arguments which (purportedly) support the idea that I am an atas-face: I stay on landed property, and have never stayed in an HDB flat before - nor an apartment. I've gone to the best schools, and I've travelled far and wide, and I speak English predominantly. "But, but, but," I argue, "it's not particularly fair to penalise me for my parents' investment savvy-ness, or my mother's willingness to queue up for the best schools, or my wanderlust! Not to mention the fact that my mother speaks NO Mandarin at all, since she was a Malaysian, and studied Bahasa Melayu rather than Mandarin. And my Dad only learnt Chinese till he was Primary 6! The fact that I speak ANY Mandarin at all is a major miracle!" Seriously speaking though, I think that the notion of a heartlander is one which is limited only by the mind. I prefer a hawker centre over the food court, and a food court over a restaurant, and I'm happy to go bargain-bin diving (as my good friends will attest!) to find the cheapest multi-plug, rather than head to the nearest D.I.Y. Fix-It shop (which, let's face it, is pretty expensive compared to the chapalang shops that exist in the heartland town centres!). I would not think about going to Tanglin, for example, to buy a lamp - it's Ikea (oh come on, this is WAY not atas!) or just some random shop in AMK or Thomson Plaza. .jpg) Ah, Thomson Plaza. That's another point of contention between Rie and me. She points to the fact that it used to be Yaohan, the Japanese supermarket, and concludes that it's got a history of atas-sion. Plus, its house supermarket recently upgraded from a regular NTUC Fairprice, to NTUC Gourmet - WOW, that's a sign of crazy atas-people living nearby.Puh-leeze. That's like saying that Tampines people are now half-Japanese because Uniqlo opened in Tampines Mall. Granted, the NTUC Gourmet has a wide selection of alternative (organic, wholistic, expensive) food, but its proximity to me has NO bearing on my poor old heartlander heart. AMK is a bit further, but I go there more often and I think I comport myself with great heartlander decorum. Today, I went and repaired my shoes with the uncle who has no shopfront - just a quasi-legal store at the lift lobby of the Sports Link building. I went to alter two pieces of clothing with an auntie who was sitting outside her store with two pedal-operated sewing machines. I bought a zip. Bubble tea. Bread for my family's breakfast tomorrow. A $1 lock. All transactions were conducted in a mixture of Mandarin and Hokkien, or in singlish. I joked with the uncle that I didn't need his card - I knew where to find him. I was very happy haggling with the sewing auntie. And I enjoyed (as I always do) walking around in the crowd, drinking my SweetTalk bubble tea, visiting ValuDollar and the many, many chapalang stores that AMK Central has... and it never feels like I'm slumming, and I don't look down on anything there. (Okay, to be very honest, some of the buskers are really quite irritating thanks to their expensive sound systems (ironic much?) , but even then it's more compassion and sympathy I feel rather than stuck up.) At no point did I feel like I really needed a nice, clean Gucci store, or a foot massage by an overenthusiastic Cartier salesperson. The point? Atas-sibility and heartlander-syndrome is really about how at home you feel in your chosen environment. It's not just that I feel like a fish out of water on Orchard Road (or Raffles Place area), it's not just that I'm prudent with money, and it's not just that I happen to have a certain zip code. It's all about the mind - for where the heart is, the mind is also. Libellés : humour, personal, thinking, writing [I rather love my AMK (or, Why I Think I am a Heartlander, or Heartland is Where the Home is)] |
mercredi, mai 20, 2009 PDL Day 06 - Life is a Temporary Assignment  This reminds me of a quote that a lovely lady once told me when I was 11 or 12, at a children's camp at the Christian Outreach to the Handicapped (1991? 1992?) - to learn to hold things with a loose grasp so that it doesn't hurt so much when God takes it away from us. (I think she was quoting Corrie Ten Boom, but I can't seem to find the actual quote and citation.) It's just really hard to remember not to grab everything we can in this "me" culture.It feels really comfortable on earth. Stuff fits us - clothes, shoes, Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. There's always something MORE to do/ say/ eat/ take/ see/ experience/ encounter/ learn/ etc. And worse still, our own human desires pull us towards these things, and unyieldingly, we lean towards them... if we forget to check ourselves. My boss once criticised this of me (and he proclaims to be a Christian) - he said "Oh! Thought police!" I'll take that as persecution, thank you very much for adding to my riches in heaven, sir. It's crazy hard to remember this particular lesson: that this isn't home. This isn't our final destination. But it's not a vacation either! There's Matt 28, our eternal "to-do list" that never ends. So we straddle the two as best we can, muddling our way through with the Holy Spirit. I asked Andy last week if I should change jobs, to something a little more fulfilling, and something that would advance my career. He told me that he had once asked Ps. Jack Snell the same question. The answer? As usual, in the practice of all psychologists/counsellors, the answer came back in the form of a probing-reflective question: "Would it take time away from God?" I gave Andy a look that resembled the oft-used emoticon: -_- ... Oh, and Andy's been in his current job for about 10 years. How can one balance all the warring needs within us? To want to fulfil ourselves and our potential, and feel like a useful member of society, versus doing God's work and fulfilling our Holy function (to glorify God)? To meld the two is not impossible, but it's hardly economically-friendly - or put in less PC terms - there's really no money/easy street when you're doing God's work. Rom 7:19-20 For I do not do the good I want, but I do the evil I do not want. Now if (I) do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me. It sucks being a sinful human. * Besides reminding me of the hymn "This World Is Not My Home", it also remind me of a lovely song by Chris Rice - Life Means So Much Life Means So Much Chris Rice [Album: Smell the Color Nine] Every day is a journal page Every man holds a quill and ink And there's plenty of room for writing in All we do is believe and think So will you compose a curse Or will today bring the blessing Fill the page with rhyming verse Or some random sketching Teach us to count the days Teach us to make the days count Lead us in better ways That somehow our souls forgot Life means so much Life means so much Life means so much Every day is a bank account And time is our currency So nobody's rich, nobody's poor We get 24 hours each So how are you gonna spend Will you invest, or squander Try to get ahead Or help someone who's under Teach us to count the days Teach us to make the days count Lead us in better ways That somehow our souls forgot Life means so much Life means so much Life means so much Has anybody ever lived who knew the value of a life And don't you think giving is all What proves the worth of yours and mine Teach us to count the days Teach us to make the days count Lead us in better ways That somehow our souls forgot Life means so much Every day is a gift you've been given Make the most of the time every minute you're living Libellés : christian, church, music, PDL2009, thinking [PDL Day 06 - Life is a Temporary Assignment] |
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